“Wow, that’s sounds like a great time–you should be happy for them! When she was able to step back and think about her true feelings–having them never get together or give it a try–she realized how rude she sounded.
” Turns out she didn’t find it as awesome as I did. This went on and on until I finally broke down and replied, “Would you rather them break up? Lilly may have felt “slighted,” but love is one the world’s biggest mysteries, and her two best friends discovered it together. More importantly, if you don’t get that, how does that make you look? And I hate to even call it a “loss.” Mannerly Nation, a proper person doesn’t want anything bad to happen to friends, like a messy break up.
But if you’re wondering how to go about dating your friend’s ex, and you think the pursuit might really have potential, don’t worry, you are not a terrible person.
We exchanged probably a dozen emails and, in about ten of them, I kept saying, “Well, aren’t you happy for them?
” I must have said a version of this in every one of those emails, working it into any situation I possibly could.
She wrote, “All they do is text back and forth to each other nonstop!
I also wondered if my hesitation had to do with a (lingering? Yet, the lack of sexual heat was an indisputable fact.
) case of commitment-phobia on my part, rather than any real doubts about the situation at hand; maybe the supposed chemistry conundrum was just a cover for my fear of getting closer to him. (Trust me on that: About six months after we broke up, Jake said, "The sex really wasn't very good, was it?